Is like wrestling a greased octopus.
I think I’d rather wrestle the octopus.
8 April, 2009
Other Countries Love Us Now
As promised, now that The Messiah reigns, America and He are both respected around the globe. Especially in Turkey.
7 April, 2009
Nancy Pelosi Goes to Church
One Saturday afternoon, in Washington, D.C., House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s aide visited the Bishop of St. Matthew’s Cathedral.
He informed the Bishop that Pelosi would be attending the next day’s mass, and asked if the Bishop would kindly point out Pelosi to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling Pelosi a saint.
The Bishop scoffed. “No. I don’t really like the woman, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of Pelosi’s views.” The aide countered, “Look. I’ll write a check here and now for a donation of $100,000 to your Archdiocese if you’ll just tell the congregation you see Pelosi as a saint.”
The Bishop mulled it over and replied, “Well, the church can use the money. You have my word.”
Sure enough, Pelosi appeared for the Sunday mass and seated herself prominently along the main aisle.
During the sermon, as promised, the Bishop pointed out that House Speaker Pelosi was present.
The Bishop went on to explain to the congregation, “While Speaker Pelosi’s presence is doubtless an honor to some, she is far from being my favorite person. Some of her views are contrary to those of the church, and she tends to flip-flop on many other views. Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite, a thumb sucker, and a nit-wit.
“She has a reputation for shirking her Representative obligations both in Washington, and in California. She simply is not to be trusted.”
“Nancy Pelosi is a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief.”
“In sum, Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed.”
“But,” he added, “when compared to Harry Reid, Pelosi is a saint.”
Updated and bumped:
But wait! There’s more!
REID, PELOSI AND THE DYING PRIEST
The old priest lay dying in the hospital. For years he had faithfully served the people of the nation’s capital. He motioned for his nurse to come near.
“Yes, Father?” said the nurse. “I would really like to see Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi before I die”, whispered the priest. “I’ll see what I can do, Father” replied the nurse.
The nurse sent the request to them and waited for a response. Soon the word arrived. Harry and Nancy would be delighted to visit the priest. As they went to the hospital, Harry commented to Nancy “I don’t know why he wants to see us, but it will certainly help our images.” Nancy couldn’t help but agree.
When they arrived at the priest’s room, the priest took Nancy’s hand in his right hand and Harry’s hand in his left. There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priest’s face.
Finally Nancy spoke. “Father, of all the people you could have chosen, why did you choose us to be with you as you near the end?”
The old priest slowly replied, “I have always tried to pattern my life after my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.”
The old priest continued…
“He died between two lying thieves. I would like to do the same.”
6 April, 2009
Too Stupid for Arby’s Strikes Again
This guy was smart not to answer the TSA goons’ questions. Every one of those knuckle draggers should be fired, if not charged.
Like that’s gonna happen.
I Can’t Keep Up
I’m having a devil of a time separating joke from reality when it comes to this misadministration.
I thought the story about The Annointed One giving an iPod as a gift to Her Royal Highness was an April Fools joke. Surely after bungling his gifts to the PM so badly He wouldn’t do something as – tacky – as this.
Not only did he do it, some folks wonder if it was even legal.
Update:
Is it time to dust off the old generic Dan Quayle jokes?
Open-mindedness
A long-time Buttle’s World reader left a link to this video in the comments of a previous article. He thought I might enjoy it.
He was right.
5 April, 2009
The Honeymoon is Officially Over
When even SNL can see the abuse of power, the tide has changed. As seems typical for SNL since, oh, Dan Aykroyd left, the sketch goes on well past the point of being funny. But check it out.
Hey, at least they loved The One in Turkey.
Reserved to Fight
This looks like it could be good, in spite of the gawshawful Flash-infested web site. Hint: Before you try to watch the trailer find the music player and make it stop or you’ll get an audio muddle.
4 April, 2009
The Question that Flummoxed the Great Orator
In The Guardian, no less, signs that they see the Emperor as underdressed.
We were seeing the same mismatch between the regulatory regimes that were in place and er … pause [I’VE LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT AGAIN] … the highly integrated, er, global capital markets that have emerged … pause [I’M REALLY WINGING IT NOW]. So at this point, I’m less interested in … pause [YOU] … identifying blame than fixing the problem. I think we’ve taken some very aggressive steps in the United States to do so, not just responding to the immediate crisis, ensuring banks are adequately capitalised, er, dealing with the enormous, er … pause [WHY DIDN’T I QUIT WHILE I WAS AHEAD?] …
Mark Steyn theorizes on the motive behind this new clarity.
It makes an instructive contrast with the hopeychangey sob-sisters of the US media, and one that may not be unrelated to the latter’s impending rendezvous with destiny.
3 April, 2009
JournoList Chat
As only Iowahawk could bring you.
(Warning: Very funny, but they are potty-mouthed liberals.)
2 April, 2009
1 April, 2009
The Periodic Table of Videos
Chemistry has never been so fun.
Try Gallium (Ga) to get started.
When Is Green Good?
When it’s black.
“Our current operating costs are two cents per square foot compared to a traditional facility of 20 cents per square foot,” said Donovan, in mid-February.
I think that used to be called “efficiency” or “cost effectiveness”. Either way, saving green is where it’s at.
